i don't care what the whispers say, cos' they whisper to loud for me.

Friday, 31 December 2010

jumper, - Abercrombie&Fitch. jeans, - ASOS. ring & earrings, - Topshop. nailvarnish, - StarGazer @ New Look

Guess who's jeans arrived! First time to wear skinny jeans in about 3 years, and the seam doens't press on either of the scars of my legs so i'm ecstatic.. i think you'll actually see me in these a lot! Definately prefer them to my usual 'hoody and leggings' look when wearing a hoody. I decided to totally keep this outfit plain and simple, quite casual. I'm so bloated after eating a huge dinner last night, so thats the majority of the reason why i opted for such a simple easy outfit hehe. I'm wearing this abercrombie jumper which is so so warm and comfortable, with the jeans, give quite a sexy casual look, i've always thought that about hoodys and jeans. It's not too casual. I kept this whole outfit simple, i'm wearing silver studded earrings and a silver leaf ring which i think looks kind of cute! I'm also loving this nail varnish, got bored last night so decided to paint them this mushroom colour. ALSO, no scuffs, scrapes or chips, happyhappyhappy!

The jeans actually fit really nicely. They sit nicely round the bum, and are highwaisted and actually sit where they're meant too with the exception of them being a little bit big. They're straight and skinny the whole way down but not so tight that i can't move, really happy with them! I like the design of them too, they're not really boring, which is always a plus!

Plans for tonight.
Can't go out because of my leg. Playing scrabble and getting wasted with the parents while my FIFTEEN year old brother goes to a party. life is unfair. CAN'T WAIT TO BE 18, atleast i can go out next new years eve! Sam's coming over around 11, so spending it with him too.


A pretty boring month, January was so long ago, i don't remember much. Um, my hair was brown! This is Me & Danny sitting, he's practically my big brother!

February made an impact on my life, so yes i actually remember quite a bit from there. Well the two guys i'm standing with i met in Tunisia in 2009 on holiday, made such good friendships that every few months they'll come and stay, and they stayed for 3 or 4 days in February half term. I remember them staying this time very well as they're was a lot going on with me. I had slipped on Christmas Eve 2009 on the ice and torn a nerve in my wrist, and i was prescribed this medicine which help nerve pain called amitriptyline, which is a tricyclic anti-depressant. I had severe side-effects to this medicine, so severe. Slight side effects consist of nausea, headaches, dizziness, etc. But i suffered from so severe that my mum nearlly had me admitted to hospital. I was suffering from mania, amnesia, suicidal thoughts, extreme paronoia and i wasn't sleeping. Apparently i packed my bags and drew loads of money out on planning to 'leave', i don't even remember doing this. I remember the boys staying, but that's about it. I can't tell you a thing that happened in February, it was horrible.

March was so very boring, don't remember a thing that happened and can't find any pictures, says it all really!

 The beginning of April was amazing, i loved it! My football tour to Holland with the football team. It was great. The fun coach journey from Amsterdam airport to Holland(such a long 2hours!), exploring the village, being followed by Dutch men, the football game, the bonding with the girls, the long bike ride. It was great! Once we came back from Holland, things went downhill for me, my nan had a stroke, i managed to dislocate my knee in the first football match back, my brother kept going to hospital was suspected appendicitis, my stressing about my GCSE exams, mum was down, then to top EVERYTHING off. due to the fact at this point i was still in a wrist splint as the nerve in my wrist wasn't healing, i was put on another type of anti-depressant for it called nortriptyline, which i reacted so badly to that i was hospitalized for 5 days, my breathing was bad and i didn't know who i was. So Yeah, first half of april = GREAT. second half of april = POO.

 Oh May, easily my favourite month i think. FINALLY FINISHING CHANCELLORS SCHOOL. I hated that school, it allowed me to be bullied so severely so the feeling of leaving was amazing! Don't get me wrong, was scary obviously as it'd be leaving friends and 6 weeks of exams.. but hello 3 months of summer! :D

 End of exams, and start of summer, whats not to love about June. My exams finished a week before prom which was good! Gave me time to relax and get a nice dress, shoes, clutch, have my nails done my first ever spray tan, my hair done.. ahh heaven! These pictures were me on my prom day :)

 The boys stayed again in July which was nice, loev spending time with them, they're so fab! Went to Wireless festival in Hyde Park which was amazing, apart from passing out at the end because of my M.E and having to have an ECG there and stuff, not good, but ohwells Have you heard of the artist Scorcher!? Well this is us here holding his towel which we managed to catch! Must say Tinie Tempah was actually amazing at Wireless to, as was Roll Deep!

August was the month of Holidays and exam results! Kavos for 10days which was amazing! Sun, Alcohol, Clubs...and managed to get a nice tan too! Then literally came home, had my nails redone, took out all my dirty clothes, repacked clean clothes, slept, and then went to the airport real early the next morning to fly out with the family to Tunisia for 2weeks. After my 10days of parting in holiday, my M.E caugght up with me. I spent the majority of my Tunisia holiday in bed, i managed to faint and trap a nerve in my neck which resulted in me being in a neckbrace and needing 3 god damn injections and breaking my toe, SO UNLUCKY haha! I came home after that holiday, and at home my exam results were awaiting! 1A, 3Bs, 5Cs, 2Ds... With an attendance of 47% i was ecstatic with those results! Oh also, me & sam finally got together on the 31st, after seeing eachother since May.. That was easily the best part of 2010.

 I decided on the date of my operation, which we scheduled for the 14th October, went to a few parties. started a new school and my a-levels which was scary. Decided to study Psychology, Drama and Media at a new school for A-levels, my boyfriends re-doing the year so he's still there and i have a few friends that go to that school who are either redoing the year like Sam or in their last year, i settled in quite nicely. Instantly preferred this school to my other one, everyones so nice! Also, got a definite diagnosis for my M.E, pretty sad, but we know i've defiantely had it a year prior so ohwelll.

 Hahaha, i had my preadmission for my operation, which i fainted at due to my bloodtest, and i also got diagnosed with a heart murmur., i find it pretty funny that the ward nurse i had in 2007 when i had my first leg operation remembered me really well 3 years later! I had my last day of school before my operation, and then come the 14th was admitted. A 4 hour operation which required my leg to be broken in half, twisted 35 degrees outwards, and plated with 6 screws, in an attempt to get me walk straight and make my hips better! I was in hospital for a week, but was meant to be in there for 2 weeks, but got discharged a week early as i was doing well. Oh morphine you beauty, i miss you haha! The day after i was discharged, my beautiful grandma died, r.i.p, and the day after that i slipped on my leg. October was horrible.

I'm 100% housebound since my operation, i think i left the house once and that was just to book ZANTE 2011 with Rosie & Joey for 10 nights, woooooo! I managed to fall twice on my leg, both times having to call an ambulance and be taken to hospital, one time i fell downstairs. Managed to fracture my wrist, which may need an operation. fml. Was also told that because of my M.E, i should either totally drop out of Sixth Form or continue with just one A-Level until the New School year (September 2011), otherwise i'm going to overdo it and end up in hospital. That was pretty stressful.

Found out that the bone in my leg isn't healing as well as they'd like which is annoying, hopefully it's gonna be a long but amazing recovery! My birthday wasn't very good, was feeling pretty low, argued with family and sam and got so so drunk on my own. But i got some lovely things. Christmas was a hell of a lot better though, got even more amazing gifts. It's now new years eve and i can't wait to say goodbye to this year. Bring on 2011. Hopefully will have amazing challenges and experiences!

Hope you all have a good New year!


Thursday, 30 December 2010

The lovely Charlotte at you were in a dream i had tagged me in this last week and i never had time to fill it in myself, but currently my gorgeous sam is asleep next to me, so thought i'd do it before he wakes up :)

1 What is your dream job?
Honestly, it would be a job which would earn me a heck of a lot of money, but that's just a dream which would include so much hard work. Possible jobs which i have actually thought about a possible career in are, a psychatrist, a lawyer, a property developer and an interior designer. I hope to either study psychiatry or law at university when i eventually go, perhaps do a cross over of the two and become a crimanologist or something, i'm uncertain.

2. What is your favourite fragrance for winter?
I have two perfumes which i'm ever so in love with at the moment, one was a present for my Birthday, the other Christmas. Gucci Guilty and Chanel No.5. Gucci Guiltys bottle is ever so eye-catching, personally i think the smells quite sexy, its the type of perfume i can continously keep smelling my wrist after i've sprayed it. Yes, it smells that good! Chanel No.5 on the other hand, is stunning, the bottle is quite plain, but the smell is so elegant, it's the type of perfume you'd expect to smell on someone who is very wealthy.

3. How do you take your tea/coffee?
I'm lactose intolerant and don't particularly like soya products so i stick to herbal teas. They're ever so lovely and relaxing. Green tea is something i drink very regularly, and Peppermint tea is another favourite of mine. I literally just have boiling water, let the tea bag sit in it for about 20 seconds, stir, and then drink. yumyumyum!

4. What is your most important beauty secret?
To always take make-up off! No matter how tired i am, i always make a point of taking my make-up off. Otherwise my skin always feels so grubby the next morning and i can feel my pores being clogged up. Also, to moisturize regularly, and to use a face mask atleast once a week to keep my skin feeling nice, clean and fresh.
5. If you had an all-expenses paid vacation anywhere, where would you go?
Very Cliché but i would love to go to New York. The shopping, the scenery, just everything. To experience that lifestyle for a couple of weeks would be truly magnificant.

6. If a genie popped up in your lap right now and offered you three wishes, what would they be?
This is a hard one, not going to lie. Ofcourse anyone who was offered 3 wishes randomly would want to be totally selfish and use them on just themself when there are infact  people more deserving of those wishes, people who really need them.
 #I'd wish for poverty to come to an end,
 #To make sure that no one ever developed a mental illness or psychical illness
 # To ensure that everyone is happy.
Being happy is such a gift and for people that aren't happy, i feel sorry for. Hopefully those 3 wishes, would make people happy.

7. If you could only have breakfast, lunch, dinner or dessert foods for the rest of your life, which would you pick?
I don't actually know.. its a tough decision between dinner and dessert foods, because i love savoury foods just as much as i love desserts. Lets go with dinner, some meals can be so extravagant and delicious, oh but so can desserts.. mmm think i'm just going to pass on this question hehe!

8. If you were Hello Kitty, what colour hairbow would you wear?
I'm really not fussed, i'm not a big Hello Kitty Fan.

9. What is your biggest make-up pet peeve?
I don't understand why someone would want to make their face totaly orange while the rest of their body is pale!? It doesn;t look right,, and surely knowing that your face is a totally different colour to the rest of your body would make you insecure!? Also, i am NOT a fan of 'foundation lips' personally, i think they look tacky. But aslong as someones comfortable in their own skin, that's all that matters, i mean people wear make-up to enhance their beauty and features so if being orange or having foundation lips makes them happy, then so be it.

10. If you could wear only one piece of jewellery for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Hands down, it would either be my beautiful Tiffany necklace or Pandora bracelet from my gorgeous boyfriend. I'm not just choosing those pieces of jewellery because he bought them for me, but because they actually mean something. The pandora bracelet and 4 charms which are on it, was a present when i came out
of hospital after my operation and for staying strong through it all, plus each charm was picked especially and means something different. He wanted to make sure it was something i'd like and each charm also happened to be the type of charm i'd choose. The Tiffany necklace was one of my Christmas presents from him, and it is a necklace with a horseshoe on it. It's absolutely beautiful, he definately spoilt me! 2010 has been a horrible year for me, everything that could of possibly went wrong, went wrong. So because i've been so unlucky in 2010 he bought me the necklace as a good luck charm, he wants me to have a really good 2011. Both those presents were so thoughtful and i'd definately chose to wear one of them for the rest of my life, prefrably both! Adore my Sam!

11. What one talent do you wish you had?
Without blowing my own trumpet, i can sing, but not like the 'OMG SHE'S GOING TO BE FAMOUS' kind of singing, more of an 'aww, thats cute' kind of voice.I wish i could sing really well. It's how i express my feelings and to actually be able to sound so beautiful when singing and hit every note i wanted to would be amazing!

12. What product will you continue to purchase?
Lee Strafford hair growth treatment, yes it ACTUALLY works! It conditions my hair beautifully and smells soooo good!

13. If you could look into the future, would you? And what would you want to know?
I wouldn't want something that may happen in the future, wreck what i have now and therefore making me change the course of things. I'm a big believer in 'everything happens for a reason', so therefore life should runs its course as it's meant to. Don't get me wrong, i'd love to look into the future, know who i marry, where i live, what my job is, how much money i earn, am i happy, how many kids i have etc etc etc, but why wreck the magic of these moments by knowing what happens in the future. Would totally spoil everything!

14. Who is you biggest celebrity crush?
Well, I can safely say that i am most definately not a Robert Pattinson fan, can't believe he was named Glamour Magainzes sexiest man of 2010 - CRAZY I honestly don't know who my biggest celebrity crush is.. there are a couple who i think are yummy though...
David Beckham is the defintion of amazing, absolutely gorgeous infact but i think my love for him stems for my infatuation with his wife! I think Victoria Beckham is perfect!

Suddenly have a soft spot for Olly Murs and Ryan Reynolds i think it's maybe thieir cheeky personalitys. A good personaltys is what makes a guy sexy. Then theres Nick Jonas, Shia LeBeouf .

(left to right) Olly Murs, Ryan Reynolds, Nick Jonas, Shia LaBeouf

15. What made you start a blog?
I'd been reading a couple blogs for a few weeks, and then thought, well i might as well create one, just for the fun of it. Didn't actually think people would follow me and read my blog, so totally honoured that i have 103 followers and people read, very greateful!

i'll be in the sky

 top, skirt, jacket, tights, rings, earrings, - Topshop
Hello outfit only consisting of Topshop items! So, i picked things out this morning in the dark as i was trying very hard not to wake Sam, very glad with how this outfit turned out. I got the jacket for my Birthday, the skirt for Christmas from my parents, and the moose ring for Christmas from a good friend! But yeah, so this pastel pink skirt is lovely, tube skirt, very comfortable to wear and in my opinion this colour looks best with a white or black top. Keep it simple, then accessorize to give the outfit so oomph. I'm wearing this long black vest top, tucked in as to leave it untucked would take away any shape from the skirt, and wearing it tucked in, although very figure hugging emphasises the pieces of clothing. I'm wearing knitted tights which compliments the vest top, and brings out the black in the jacket. The jacket goes greatly with this outfit, it sits nicely and doesn't overshadow the other pieces of clothing! I decided to wear this cream rose ring as it compliments the creamy white of the jacket, and the earrinsg i'm wearing totally match thing ring. I also like this gold moose ring, very unique.

For anyone thinking of buying a new mascara, i 100% recommend Rimmels Lash Accelorator. I't's honestly so good, it doesn't clump my eyelashes together, the brush is really nice for applying, and it doesn't give you a tacky look, which i think cheap mascaras can if your getting a clumped mascara look. This seperates the eyelashes nicely, yet still gives such a nice look. Love this mascara, and i only purchased it yesertday for £8.99 from Boots. It was recommended to me by the lovely Brittany at Brittany Love. Be sure to check out her blog, she's got some great beauty tips, and some amazing reviews on skin care and beauty products. Thanks Brittany for this amazing recommendation, I'm definately satisfied with this purchase, and was worth every penny.

All of the stars, have faded away..

Wednesday, 29 December 2010

Oh how these pictures make me laugh, we're such losers! These were taken at like 1am this morning when Sam stayed over. Cuddled up with him, snuggled with a blanket and drinking green tea. Aboslutely perfect! Love my Sam! He makes me happy :)

Anyawys, no outfit post for you guys today, my M.E's really bad, and my throat feels like it's on fire. As a result of this ,i've spent the majority of the day watching tv snuggled up with a blanket wearing a pair of tracksuit bottoms and an Abercrombie & Fitch jumper, and i didn't feel that was appropriate. Feeling pretty low too, pretty rubbish, meh, hopefully thigns will approve. My M.E doctor has mentioned that maybe i should be prescribed anti-depressants as it's meant to help, feeling so low and so consumed in my own world is horrible, hopefully they'll help this low feeling at the moment.

This evening i plan on staying snuggled up on the sofa, watching yesterdays recorded episode of Bad Girls and tonights episode of Hollyoaks while eating a cheese & tomato dominos pizza and drinking diet coke. I've got a busy day tomorrow, doctors early tomorrow morning, then physio in the afternoon, then rest rest rest. My M.E's really playing up at the moment, i don't find the energy to do anything, it's horrible, and the weather really makes things worse!

Stripes&Denim ++++

Tuesday, 28 December 2010


top , - Zara. shorts, - Urban Outfitters. belt, ring, & tights, - Topshop. Necklace, - Tiffanys

The top i'm wearing is actually real long, and looks nice with leggings, but as ALL my leggings seem to be in the wash i thought it'd go quite nicely tucked into my denim shorts. These shorts are actually a little too big for me which is annoying as it makes me look alot bigger in the area that they're worn then i actually am, but ohwell, suppose you win some and you lose some.The top is a little too low cut for my liking to, i'm not the type of a girl who likes to show her cleavage, or flaunt what she's got or any of that. I like to be sexy, but not in a 'oh my gosh, look out how much flesh i have on show' kind of sexy. More of a mysterious kind of sexy. I decided to wear this belt that actually came with a pair of shorts i bought from Topshop, but thought it went quite nicely with this outfit. I'm wearing black tights as always, i think they can add class to any outfit. Yes, as you can see i'm wearing my beautiful Tiffanys that my amazing boyfriend bought me for Christmas, i think it really works with this outfit, and gives it the va va voom it needs. I opted for a little silver leaf ring mumsy bought me for Christmas as it sits nicely. Would always chose silver or white gold jewellery for an outfit that consits of pastel colorus such as light blue, or cream, gold just would of made the look, look cheap & tacky.

Just thought i'd let you all know, i'm braving my fear of jeans and have actually ordered a high waisted black skinny pair from ASOS! I'm really hoping that they won't push on my scars from my operations, as the seams sit write where the scars are. Also hoping they won't leave me looking like a whale, has always been an exrtra reason i for me not wearing jeans, i've always felt they make my thighs look massive, and my thighs in my eyes are my problem area, i never made an effort to wear them. So fingers crossed they'll look okay, i will post a picture when they arrive! I also ordered 2 little somethings for Sam, 2 tube skirts, one in black, and one in hot pink, a black long sleeved bodycon jersey dress, some shapers underwear adn a little ring. Looking forward to my little package arriving, and all in the sale... so i don't feel too guilty for spluring so soon after Christmas!

Picture taken from http://www.weheartit.com/
'Why don't you be the artist, and make me out of clay. Why don't you be the writer and decide the words i say'
Totally random, but thought it needed saying.. i'm totally obsessed with 2 lines from Ellie Goudlings song 'The Writer' no idea why, but i keep replaying them over & over in my head. I'm trying to analyze in my head why i feel such a strong connection with these words, no idea as of yet! I feel the picture above really fitted the lyrics too. The lyrics are beautiful, truly beautiful.

OOTD + 100% spoilt!

Monday, 27 December 2010

jumper, tights & earrings, - Topshop. ring, - River Island.

Firstly, let me apologize for how horrible i look. I've got laryngitis again, and my M.E's been playing up, so i really couldn't be bothered to make the effort for todays outfit post, just did not have the energy. I'm wearing this jumper that i got for Christmas, very snug and warm. I like how the blue print on the jumper can be misinterpreted as either a flower or a snowflake, therefore making it perfect for all seasons. I like the creamy colour of the jumper contrasted with the pastel blue, i think they suprisingly go pretty well together. Usually i would wear this outfit with a pair of black leggings, but i couldn't find mine, so instead i opted for black tights. If i'd of worn leggings, the outfit would of looked more laid back and casual, as it would of just been a long jumper and a pair of leggings, but as i opted for tights instead, i think the jumper looks quite a lot like a dress?! Still a pretty cute outfit in my opinion. I'm wearing this cute little fox rhinestone ring, which i thought totally didn't go with the outfit, and thats why i had to wear it haha. Love this little ring, was defiantely worth it's £14.

 So, Sam is finally better after his being ridiculously ill for a week with severe food poisoning! So happy for him, he was so ill bless him. As he was so ill, it meant that my plan to spend a few hours with him on Christmas day to exchange presents and chill was ruined, so today, we decided to spend the day together as he's now finally better! We exchanged presents, and i was so shocked and unbelievably happy with what he got me, totally spolit AGAIN by him.. to think it s my birthday a week before Christmas, and he spoilt me then too. Gosh, i bet i've made a serious hole in his wallet! But yeah, as i've now given him his presents i can actually tell you what i got him. I got him.. Lacoste Challenge Aftershave, a orange & grey striped Hollister polo, a blue Hollister sweater, a pair of boxers, 3 pairs of socks from Topman, and the Vans(pair of plimsole shoes) he wanted from Office. And i ordered him a little something from ASOS as a late present,as i saw it in the sale, and he'd said he liked it, so that's going to be kind of a New Years present haha. But now, let me show you properly what he got me!

 He found it absolutely outrageous that i hadn't seen Superbad! He'd sometimes come out with a few quotes from the film, and i'd be so baffled as to what he'd be talking about. So apparently him buying me this Superbad DVD as a present was a MUST-DO!
 I always feel the cold in my hands really bad, my fingers go blue quite quickly, it's rather odd. So he bought me hand warmers, probably the most practicle present EVER!
 When i came out of hospital after the operation on my leg, i was feeling so very low. So he went and bought me a Pandora bracelet, which i've posted about before. I already have 2 lovely charms, but he suprised me with two more BEAUTIFUL Pandora Charms for the bracelet! Very cute, and probably the 2 i'd of picked out, if i was to choose charms for myself. The charm on the left kind of has a leaf/flower pattern on it, and the charm on the right is kind of like a wheel with a dangly pearl. Stunning, absolutely stunning!
 This is the most thoughtful, and beautiful present! It's a horse-shoe pendant necklace from Tiffanys&Co! I was totally speechless, with a huge smile on my face when i opened this present and read the little note from him. So cute! 'To Courtney, thought you might need a little help on the luck side, Love Sam' It makes me laugh that he missed the word 'need' out on the card haha! I've had a really tough year, 2010 has been horrible and he knows how unlucky i am, so this necklace is perfect. Hoping it will bring me good luck in the coming year of 2011, he's like my good luck charm! Can't put into words how much i love this necklace. PerfectPerfectPerfect!

As you can see, i was totally spoilt by my boyfriend, aren't i just the luckiest girl!? He's too good to me, he really is. He's one in a million, and i'm so lucky to have him.

- Also, decided to add a 'Like' button to my blog posts as i know a lot of people read my blog who don't have a blog, and don't want to comment anonymously, so i thought a 'Like' button was in order! :)